Took the littlest boychild to cycle in the Pride Parade, this morning. He had a good time, having always wanted to be in a parade, and vowed to go back dressed as a goddess next year. (We were marching with a neo-pagan group.) After, we sat on the lawn of the big city park, where they were having a Pride Fest, and listened to music and ate Italian ices. He told me, "Thank you so much for bringing me to Pride, Mama, because I am really really gay. There are boys EVERYWHERE I want to have babies with." I laughed -- I couldn't help it -- and then explained what bisexuality is, just in case, and then he went on in that sucking up, grateful for everything, blissed out sort of I-love-the-whole-world mood he gets into sometimes. He chatted about good things while I got us onto our bikes, and as we were waiting at a stop light, we had this little exchange.
Typhon: "Thank you so much for helping me do my dreams, Mama."
Me: "Well, that's kind of the purpose of a mom, kiddo."
Typhon: "Yeah but believe me, you have to give up a lot to do it, and I know all parents don't really have to, because, well, not that I want to say bad things about Dad, but because of Dad."
Then we were off again, on our bikes, on our way, and conversation did not continue except in my head. There, it went something like this.
Not that I don't love that you noticed and acknowledged what is going on here, kiddo, but talking about what moms sacrifice as though that's noble is actually anti-female cowpoop. Moms shouldn't have to sacrifice anything to give their kids their dreams. Moms should drag their kids along as they attend to dream-creating so kids see how dreams get built up into lives; then later the kids should drag the moms along for the kids' dream-creating so moms can stay with it in this crazy-modern future. That is how being a human is meant to be, so any time a situation seems to demand that you choose between it and doing what's best for your kid, you kick up a fuss.
Typhon: "Thank you so much for helping me do my dreams, Mama."
Me: "Well, that's kind of the purpose of a mom, kiddo."
Typhon: "Yeah but believe me, you have to give up a lot to do it, and I know all parents don't really have to, because, well, not that I want to say bad things about Dad, but because of Dad."
Then we were off again, on our bikes, on our way, and conversation did not continue except in my head. There, it went something like this.
Not that I don't love that you noticed and acknowledged what is going on here, kiddo, but talking about what moms sacrifice as though that's noble is actually anti-female cowpoop. Moms shouldn't have to sacrifice anything to give their kids their dreams. Moms should drag their kids along as they attend to dream-creating so kids see how dreams get built up into lives; then later the kids should drag the moms along for the kids' dream-creating so moms can stay with it in this crazy-modern future. That is how being a human is meant to be, so any time a situation seems to demand that you choose between it and doing what's best for your kid, you kick up a fuss.